MARCH SADNESS

I guess technically it's no longer considered "March Madness" once you hit April.

Maybe that explains why ratings fizzled Monday night for the NCAA College Basketball Championship between Florida and UCLA. Or maybe it was because all of the favorites, both sentimental (George Mason) and statistical (UConn, Duke, etc.) were eliminated. Let's face it - for all of its hype, the tournament is really only interesting as long as you're invested emotionally or financially. Once your school is done, it's all about your pool picks. And once those are gone, it's all about next year.

So it really doesn't surprise me that the game didn't pull a bigger audience. I WAS surprised to learn, however, that it was the first time that the annual event didn't win its time slot. Frighteningly, more people watched Deal or No Deal Monday night on NBC than the NCAA Championship game. I am now officially worried about about the state of our nation's mental health.

Have you seen that show? It's like a game show without a game. You don't have to be smart, clever, intuitive, quick-witted, or anything. You don't have to be good at spelling, deductive logic, or trivia. You don't really have to be anything other than breathing and mildly lucid.

It's a "game" show that features a series of contestants making uneducated guesses. Sometimes they're right and sometimes they're wrong. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day (which, I feel obliged to point out, is more than can be said for Sean Hannity).

Basically, Deal or No Deal goes like this.

A or B?

A!

Sorry, it was B.

A or B?

B!

Sorry, it was A.

A or B?

A!

Yes, it was! A or B?

B!

Yes, it was again - boy you're good at this. A or B?

A!

Sorry, it was B again.


It's like the kind of game desperate parents make up to amuse an anxious 3 year old child in the waiting room at the doctor's office. And now it's pulling more viewers than the college basketball championship game. Apparently our lowest common denominator is lower than I thought.

More money for education - stat!