THOSE HORNY BARBARIANS

Did you see the news today??

Vikings Allegedly Had Sex Party on Boats

Holy friggin' crap! Finally, some news worth printing.






And then I started reading the article and realized they were talking about the MINNESOTA Vikings. Yeah - those FAKE Vikings who claim to play football. I thought this was going to be some big historical revelation about how rowdy ancient Scandinavians used to host the best orgies in the new world. Now THAT would have made for a story.

Instead, I'm wading through the details of a 90-minute "team event" cruise during which there were drugs and live sex acts performed on football players. Where's the news in THAT? Sound the alarms - professional athletes practice infidelity on the open sea. Big fucking whoop. I'll tell you what a real story would be:

Team of Computer Engineers at M.I.T. Board Wrong Boat, Score Repeatedly

These are NFL players we're talking about here. Infidelity is in their contract. They HAVE to accept illicit drugs and lap dances from prostitutes. Ask Michael Irvin or Lawrence Taylor - they'll tell you all about it.

Stereotypes exist for a reason - so people have something to live down to.