Mass murderer and all-purpose freak, Dennis Rader, began serving a life sentence today for the “BTK” sex-murders that terrorized the heartland for 17 years. For his heinous crimes, Dennis the Menace was sentenced to 10 consecutive life terms…with no chance of parole for 175 years. I don’t know why they bother mentioning that he becomes eligible for parole in 175 years – he would have to live to be 235. I’m sure it’s just a formality, but it’s beside the point. Allow me to simplify his sentence by reporting that Denny’s last gasp will be behind bars. And that’s all you need to know about that.
So who WAS this horrible butcher?
A.) An ex-rodeo clown and grenade enthusiast
B.) A former marine and comic book aficionado
C.) A mysterious transient with an I.Q. of 157
D.) A former church congregation president and Boy Scout leader
Sorry - did I make it too obvious? What gave it away, the church president or the Boy Scout leader?
If you’re wondering about his nickname, BTK…well, he gave it to himself. It stands for “bind, torture and kill.” Please don't confuse this maniac with the “BK killer,” otherwise known as the Double Whopper with Cheese – a gluttonous fast food offering that packs a heart-stopping 1060 calories. The BK killer doesn’t torture – it just binds and kills. Slowly. Pleasantly. It's an execution in good taste, really. The BK Killer satisfies you for years before delivering its surprise death blow. Taking a bite out of crime has never been so delicious!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment