Monday, October 17, 2005


If you build it, they will come.

And we did. Richardson's Farm is home to the world's largest corn maze. I didn't realize how popular these things have become in recent years. Farmers are letting people into their corn crops and reaping the benefits. There was a 50 foot slide for the kids, a petting zoo, pumpkins for sale, and some of the most structurally sound port-o-potties I've ever hung out in, so to speak. It's simply amazing how these things are created - with just a few cases of Coors and some garden shears. Actually, it may be a little more involved than that.

So what's the point to all of this cornograffiti? To have fun and make money, of course. We had the fun, they made the money. They hand everyone maps at the beginning and the idea is to travel deep into the labyrinth in search of posted landmarks. At each post there is a hole puncher that you use to notch your map with a different shape indicating you found that post. Two hours later you emerge victorious and turn in your map to receive a token gift. It's the perfect way to spend a Sunday with family - especially kids.

One twist I would have liked to have seen - a HAUNTED corn maze. No maps - just flashlights handed out to a few bold adventurers on a chilly autumn night. Imagine wandering around in the thick of a cornfield surrounded by eerie noises, growling dogs, panting, footsteps, chainsaws, etc. And as you find yourself at a dead end in the middle of the maze your flashlight buzzes over a rotting corpse, severed in several places by the blade of a rusty sickle. Yeah - that's what I'M talking about. The scariest damn haunted "house" experience of all time. You'd hear people screaming around every corner - and you'd be completely lost! Almost makes me wish I had my own corn maze to dress up for Halloween.

There are corn mazes all over the place. To find out if there's one near you, Google it and plan a corny outing of your own.

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