I love this one.
Moses Bittok, 40, immigrated from Kenya to the U.S. to live the American dream – and did he ever. He fucking won the Lotto the day he became a U.S. citizen! Yes, this is a true story.
Shortly after taking the oath of citizenship in Des Moines, Iowa last Friday, Moses discovered he had won $1.89 million in the Iowa Lottery's Hot Lotto game. He cashed in his ticket yesterday, electing to spread out his winnings over 25 years with annual payments of $52,920…AFTER taxes. Sorry ladies, Moses is married and has a 4-year-old little girl.
Like many immigrants, "Mojo" Moses came to the U.S. to attend college, after which he moved to Iowa and took a job at a women's prison. He bought the winning ticket at a West Des Moines grocery store where he used to work part time. I can hear Moses now, declaring his disbelief excitedly in a thick Kenyan accent: “I canno believe it. Is this heaven?”
No Moses – it’s Iowa.
Congratulations.
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