LICKING AN OLD HABIT

Funny how little things can drive people nuts.

For example, I have the particularly unrefined habit of leaving my coffee spoon in my coffee mug. When I make coffee at home, it's usually instant. I really don't have the patience for anything else - even waiting 2 minutes for the microwave to boil my water seems like a small eternity some mornings.

Once the water is scalding hot, I'll add the crystals with a teaspoon, dump in a little sugar, add a little milk, stir it all up, then drink it down. But for some reason, I don't take the spoon out of the mug. I actually sip it slowly with a shiny stem of silverware inches from my eyeball. For no apparent reason other than habit.

Geri informed me recently that this unseemly practice gives her the heebie-jeebies, and she asked if it were within my capability to remove the stirring utensil from my ceramic caffeine transport before bringing the handled helper to my lips. No problem, I said. And I haven't left a spoon in my coffee since.

It is with this recent example of voluntary behavior modification in mind that I formally make the following request of the thousands upon thousands of people around whom I will be spending the remainder of my life. It's a very simple thing, really, that has the potential to spare me countless bouts of spontaneous nausea over the course of my life.

Would you please - PLEASE - try to find a way to turn the page without licking your fingers? That's all I ask. I know it's possible because I've been doing it my entire life. I thank you in advance, as does your immune system.