Tuesday, January 03, 2006


Do you ever wonder how many years of you’ll life you’ll end up navigating automated telephone systems? Neither do I. But I bet it’s at least 5 years. Seems every time you call a customer service number these days a recorded voice prompts you to indicate your intentions with the push of a button. First you’ve got to choose your language of choice, which for some reason always makes me stop and look around to make sure I’m still in America. Then, the call is transferred and the phone rings again and you get another recorded message. This time they want you to enter your account number so they “can service you better.” Then the call transfers again, there’s more ringing, and another machine answers, this time it’s playing music. “Your call is important to us. Please continue holding and your call will be taken in the order it was received.” After a long wait, the phone rings again and another message: This call may be monitored for quality assurance purposes. Sometimes they’ll even ask you if you want to take part in a survey following the call. I always say yes so I can bitch about how long I had to wait for a live person.

Well, my friends – wait no longer! Some guy has posted a list of the quick key commands you can enter to bypass the automated system for a large number of retail and financial industry companies. Now you can get a live person on your first try!

It’s bloody fucking brilliant, and I’m not even close to British.

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